How to Manage the Waves of Grief and Find Inner Peace

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Boom! Just like that, the waves of grief crash in on you out of nowhere. Right when you think you have it all figured out, here comes the unstoppable tears, the overwhelming sadness, and the unexplainable anger associated with grief. Grief is one of life’s most difficult experiences. In this post, you will see ways to move forward in the healing process and find peace.

Staring Grief in the Face

Grief is sneaky. The emotions come in like crushing waves that are overwhelming. The Wandering Paddy AKA Jamie describes this feeling in a poem titled Grief Comes in Waves.[1] For many people, the grieving process is the most challenging moment. Nothing can prepare you for losing someone who meant the world to you. Finding peace when you’ve lost a loved one is no easy journey. It calls for you to reshape your life because of the absence of your loved one. New routines to establish a new “normal” are needed. Thus, you must acknowledge and accept the loss to move forward and find peace. You must get in grief’s face.

Stacy Henagan wrote a book titled Breathe Again. You are probably saying you do not see how this is possible. However, she offered some insightful pieces of advice throughout the book. She says, “Let’s not be people who shrink back or give up because we can’t make sense of God’s ways or don’t feel His presence in the moment. He’s with us always.”[2] Therefore, you can stare grief in the face and say, “I am not scared, and you will not get the best of me. God is my keeper and strength.” With God, you have the strength to do what seems to be impossible. Press on.

Finding Peace in the Process

Each day will have its own challenges, but do not try to suppress your feelings; work through them as they come. One moment at a time, one step at a time, one day at a time, to move forward in the grieving process. Be intentional with your breathing and release some of the tension and pain. One of my grandmother’s favorite hymnals was Have a Little Talk with Jesus. God is waiting to hear about what is hurting you and causing you pain. The psalmist says, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit” (Psalm 34:18 New International Version). God will give you the peace and comfort you need day by day. It just might take a little time (so be patient), a lot of strength (so hold on), and some support from your remaining loved ones (so accept the help).

Find Support

You may feel alone when grieving, but that’s not the case. There are people you can call upon to help you manage the pain of grief, including your friends and family, neighbors, and the church. It’s much easier to bear the weight of grief when you have others helping to lift. For many people, finding solace in faith and spirituality can be a source of comfort during times of grief. Turning to Jesus can provide a sense of hope and support. Connecting with a religious community or seeking guidance from a spiritual leader can offer guidance and strength. Google, Google, and Google. Find out what local grief support groups might be available. Grief Share is one of the popular grief support groups with some local churches. To see if it is in your vicinity, visit their website: https://www.griefshare.org/.

Conclusion

When the waves of emotions come crashing in, take a breath, say a prayer, and allow yourself to grieve the loss of your loved one. It will take time, but the mean days will get easier as you learn to manage the waves and depend on help from friends and family. Most importantly, it is through trust in God and leaning on Him for strength that peace can be found.

References:

[1]The Wandering Paddy AKA Jamie, “Grief Comes in Waves Poem [Spoken Word, Irish, Quote, Poetry],” January 7, 2022, YouTube video, 2:46, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=txUhyub6ybc.

[2] Stacy Henagan, Breathe Again: Choosing to Believe There’s More When Life Has Left You Broken (Nashville: Emanate Books, 2020), 57.